And Sometimes Extended Warranties Are Worth It!

Being the extraordinarily frugal person that I am, you will understand why I routinely say no to extended warranties for appliances.  These warranties are basically a bet by a company that you will never encounter a problem with their product or you will be too lazy to call and deal with the hassle of enforcing your warranty.  These companies charge a ridiculous amount to extend the basic warranty that comes with the product and they clearly must be making some serious dough from marketing these contracts based on how enthusiastically their sales staff recommend them.

But, about four years ago, when we finally replaced the television that we inherited from my Mom and Dad back in the day when Will Smith was still "fresh," we actually made the decision to buy an extended warranty for our new television.  When I say that we made a "decision" . . . that is not entirely accurate.  It was more like after chasing our two hyperactive preschool children all over Best Buy and enduring fifteen minutes of nonstop squirming and screaming while we waited in line, we acquiesced to the sales associate's tactics.  This twenty-five year old, childless salesman could sense our weakness.  Over-tired parents who are standing in line with their sugared-up children are like shark chum to sales people.  At that point, we would have agreed to just about anything to get out of the store with a functioning t.v.

Now this "new" television was nothing fancy and there certainly wasn't anything flat about it.  It weighed an absolute ton.  It took my husband, myself, and a random sales guy about thirty minutes to lift it out of the store and figure out how to jam it into the front passenger seat of our Passat.  We had to take it out the box and unwrap it so that we could squeeze it in. 

For the next four years, our television performed admirably.  It played host to the occasional red box video, diligently hooked me up with Dr. Derek Shepherd on Thursday nights, and fed my children a constant diet of PBS shows and Caillou videos.  It was also good for a few laughs.  We have a relatively nice house; from the outside and in most rooms, it even looks fairly modern.  Most people seem to like our tan, Pottery Barnish paint and simple Shaker style furniture.  But after people leave the foyer and enter our family room, most people have trouble concealing the smirks that creep across their faces when they eye the giant silver box with rabbit ears attached.  For those of you who have forgotten what "rabbit ears" are, they are a portable antenna that connects to the television set.  I am not about to pay Comcast a preposterous amount of money every month just so that they can feed my television addiction and rot my children's brains in the process.  This house is cable-free, baby!  (Never mind that we have a high speed internet connection and my eight year old son can type the words "Clone Wars" into a keypad faster than you can say cable.)  The point is I have my principles and I stick to them.

Oh sure, there have been times when I have wavered on my no cable stance.  I have to admit I was a tad embarrassed the day that my friend came over for a playdate and wanted to watch an acquaintance of hers that was appearing on Oprah.  She asked me to turn on Oprah and I said:  "Oooookay.  Please stand where you are and try not to move."  She looked at me like I had three heads while I spent the next ten minutes tussling with the rabbit ears and contorting my body into bizarre ballet like poses while I tried to optimize the reception of the t.v.  You see sometimes tin foil can enhance your reception, but when you don't want to head to the drawer for Reynold's wrap, sometimes your body can act like an extension of the antenna and improve reception.  Needless to say, we didn't get Oprah in very well that day because my friend wasn't really interested in standing still like a statue and squinting to make out Oprah's face through the fuzz on the t.v.

Well it turns out . . . that whole Oprah fiasco will probably never happen again.  A few weeks ago, our t.v. started making this weird high-pitched noise from time to time.  And then it refused to show my husband's video games.  That was all it took to prod him into action.  He was on the phone with Best Buy.  And guess what?  They couldn't fix our t.v. because they don't make televisions like that anymore.  But they happily agreed to give my husband full credit for the original purchase price.  Yesterday, my husband cruised into Best Buy with our old t.v. and a $100 gift certificate that he had won in a raffle.  He emerged with a brand spanking new television and a new digital receiver (which is really nothing more than another set of "rabbit ears," but it looks much cooler than our old antenna).  It only cost him eleven bucks to get a 32" LCD HDTV!!!!  He went for the 720 pixel  instead of the 1080 after discussing the nuances with a salesman.  The sales guy admitted that unless you were going to spring for HD cable, it makes no sense to get the finer resolution.  HD cable?  Puhhhlleeese.  We aren't even springing for basic.  But I have to admit, as we nestled into the couch last night and flipped on the new t.v., we were astounded by the unbelievable picture quality.  We even stayed in front of the t.v. and watched the Amazing Race, which we never do.  Sometimes technology can be a beautiful thing and extended warranties can be too!

We May Not Be Olympians . . . But We Are Still "Runners"

The alarm went off at 6 a.m. this morning so that my husband could stumble down the stairs and prepare himself to race in the annual 5k that winds its way through our neighborhood.  He's been training for weeks, somehow finding the strength to pull on his sneakers every night after the kids have finally gone to sleep.  Most nights he runs in the dark at about 9 o'clock at night.  While he grumbles from time to time, there can be no doubt that this man is committed and maybe just a tad obsessed.

Today, the kids and I waited anxiously on our front yard.  It was a beautiful September morning.  The layer of fog that had blanketed our neighborhood had just lifted and the sun was shining.  It was a bit chilly and there was no wind.  As the flashing blue lights of the police car made their way down our street, we drew closer to the road.  The first runner was a tall man who effortlessly glided over the pavement in long, confident strides.  He was probably in his thirties and was wearing a shirt from a marathon.  By the time he passed our house, about a mile and a quarter into the race, he was about a quarter of a mile ahead of the second runner.  I just watched him in awe.  I didn't feel the need to clap; this guy didn't need my encouragement.  He clearly had some serious genetic help.

The second runner was more frenzied than the first.  He was trying to keep up with the gazelle that kept pulling further and further away from him.  But he still was a very strong runner, who also didn't need my applause.  He didn't look particularly friendly . . . just focused.

Then we spotted the red jersey that my husband was wearing and we erupted into cheers.  This was someone who definitely needed our support.  Nothing is effortless about my husband's running stride.  You can tell that he is pushing himself to an uncomfortable point.  But that man is nothing if not persistent.  While he may not be genetically gifted, he trains hard and he's not afraid to push himself to the point of pain.  He has overcome some unbelievable obstacles in his life and he's not someone who will ever quit and just start walking.

After he had passed, a large mass of runners went by who represented the middle of the pack.  These were mostly dedicated runners who train pretty regularly.  A lot of them were smiling and enjoying the race.  Their infectious positive energy pulled us into the race and made us cheer louder.  These runners knew that they were not going to win the race, but they didn't care.  They were running for fun, because it feels good while you're doing it and feels even better when you're done.

As this group dwindled, there was a pause in the race and then came the last group.  This final group was comprised of people who were struggling just to finish the race.  Most of these people had looks of determination on their sweat-streaked, red faces.  They were not smiling.  They were not having fun.  They were struggling to find a rhythm even as their lungs burned and their legs ached.  We reserved our loudest cheers for this group.  Although they were facing inevitable defeat and would still be running long after the first runner had finished, these people kept going . . . trying not to walk too often.  My daughter and her friend launched into a cheer for this group of:  "Go, runners, go!  Go, runners, go!"  This caused almost all of the people in this group to instantaneously break out into smiles and thank us for the encouragement.  These people felt good about their accomplishment and we all felt proud that they had earned the right to be called "runners."

The Newest Gender Bending Fall Fashion Statement

 Last weekend I went to see the new Drew Barrymore film with a friend.  The movie was amusing and unexpectedly original, but what completely rocked my world was the bold fashion statement that Miss Barrymore made with a bow tie in one of the scenes.  Being the fashion forward woman that I am, I've decided to embrace the bow tie and dedicate my fall fashion season to this audacious gender bending look. 

Last week, when I was freshly inspired by the movie, I raided my husband's closet and found a gold mine of brand-new, unopened bow ties.  I taught myself how to tie them and I trotted out my new look at a school picnic and a Saturday night fundraiser.  That's right, ladies, this look is versatile.  Now .  . . I'm not advocating the wearing of bow ties on a daily basis.  Gender bending can definitely be overdone.  For example, Diane Keaton's constant reliance on white collared shirts, ties, and gloves, not only became boring, but also a little creepy.  On the other hand, I personally think that there is nothing more alluring than occasionally wearing an oversized men's dress shirt.

The point is everyone should use fall as a time to experiment with their appearance.  Whether you're a man or a woman, and whether you want to wear a different hairstyle, try some new make-up, or debut an unusual accessory, now is the time to be adventurous.  People often let fear and potential embarrassment hold them back.  I truly believe that you can only find real happiness when you abandon your fears.

What Is a Virtuous Voluptuary?

For the past few weeks, I have been moping around the house, trying to figure out what I should be doing with my life.  I felt like something was missing.  Don't get me wrong . . . there are of plenty of things that I should be doing, but I just didn't feel like I wanted to do them.  You see, Barbie and I have been having this major problem.  Every day I tuck her away into the cabinet in the family room that is supposed to be her home and then somehow . . . she sneaks out.  Not only does she sneak out, but she brings her friends and their clothes too.  And she inevitably throws this raging party all over my family room floor.  Well, last night, as I was wading through the rubble of shoes and dresses that Barbie and her posse had thrown onto every square inch of the rug, I knew that I needed to make a change.  I want the opportunity to create something that will not be immediately erased by Barbie and her demolition crew.  

This blog is going to be my new little indulgence.  I invite you to come along and share my adventures.  In the next few days, we are going to be talking about the newest fall fashion trend that I have decided to embrace, my favorite fall pleasures, and anything else that inspires me.  It should be fun and probably just a little manic.

Before I end this inaugural post, I wanted to explain what a "virtuous voluptuary" is.  Before you get too excited and start thinking that I look like Christina Hendricks or something, I want to assure you that there is more than one meaning of "voluptuous."  I am a voluptuary because I am someone who is committed to the enjoyment of luxurious and pleasurable things.  As my friends all know, I am a dedicated hotel snob and absolutely demand clean, well-decorated accommodations.  But at the same time, I am a committed minimalist (who detests clutter) and always looks for a bargain.  That is where the virtuous part comes in.  I aspire to the virtues of frugality, minimalism, and pragmatism.  Okay, I'll admit that I don't always follow these principles, but I certainly try and if you read this blog, you will definitely see me enthusiastically proselytizing these virtues.